If you have more than one
kid, then you know exactly what I’m talking about. When my kids first started their lives
together as brother and sister, it was great, my daughter loved having a new baby brother, so much so
that she literally would not leave him alone like when he was finally sleeping
after crying for an hour straight or when she thought that she was mommy and took it upon
herself to get him out of his crib when the real mommy wasn’t looking, but she
meant well, she just didn’t want to leave her cute baby brother alone
because she just loved him so much.
Then it happened…...he learned
to walk and talk and wanted to do boy stuff (turns out, boys don’t like Barbie dolls
and playing dress up) and she didn't like that at all. Her cute baby brother
that she loved so much suddenly became her sworn enemy and everyday in our
house was like being in a war zone. My wonderful days now consist of fixing toys one broke
because the other took their toy, yelling STOP IT NOW a million times, pretending I don’t
hear someone crying “Mommy, she/he hurt me!” and hoping this isn’t the one time
their actually hurt, or separating them every five minutes just for them to
attempt playing together again two seconds later knowing it won’t end well, or
wondering if it’s ok to just lock your children in their own rooms (I wouldn’t
actually do this, but can’t say I haven’t deeply thought about it) . Sometimes, I truly believe my kids HATE each other
and from their occasional screams, I’m pretty sure they have tried to kill each other. Just
when I’m convinced that maybe they do still like each other when they play a
game together, laugh together, or I catch them hugging each other, one ends up hitting
the other, or stealing their toy, or one just won’t stop talking (because that’s
apparently a reason to scream and hit someone). It’s a battle I can not
win.
So, what do I do you ask…….
nothing, absolutely nothing. After constantly being the referee in a never-ending
match that has no winner, I finally put in my two weeks notice, I no longer
wanted to be a referee it just wasn’t the job for me (they said I was unfair so
I probably would’ve been fired anyway). I have heard ever ridiculous argument that you
couldn’t possibly even imagine, like the time he farted on her and laughed, but
when she farted back, he screamed and had a melt down because girls aren’t
supposed to fart (Yes, that’s a true story, you can’t make this stuff up), then
there’s the time she hit him for breathing, yes, you read right, for breathing
(Lord help me), or the best most ridiculous one, she scraped her knee and when
I gave her a Band-Aid, he said I only loved her because I didn’t give him one
and that she didn’t deserve my love. There is only so much you can actually do,
I’m not doing some of these things people are doing that supposedly work for
their fighting siblings, because let me just tell you now, it’s not going to
help mine. I’m not putting them in a large shirt together and calling it the “get
along shirt” because it will end up being used as a weapon somehow, like a way to
strangle each other or suffocate each other. I am not sitting them down to talk
through their problems just so I can end up being the one stuck arguing with
them both. Time outs, separating, or grounding them does not work, trust me, I
have literally tried it all and it usually back fires.
I know that’s it’s just all a
apart of being siblings and they eventually grow out of it and as much as I
hate to wish away their childhood, I wish they would hurry up and grow out of
it because they are literally stuck with each other, there are no return or
exchange options available. I’ve been to my breaking point so many times, I’ve
been to my crying point, I’ve even been to my just go hide point (where I hide
longer than I probably should), BUT THEN.…I see it….these little glimpses of
hope…like my prayers have finally been answered…. there’s these moments when
you can hear them laughing together at a funny show or at a game they’re
playing together, or when one falls down or gets hurt and the other is right
there to ask if they’re okay (funny how that works), but then there’s my
favorite moment of all, those moments when I go in to see if one is asleep and
find them BOTH snuggled up lying in bed together. Now those are moments I
cherish and hold on to when they start fighting again and best believe I’m
getting videos and pictures every single time I get one of those rare moments,
yes I stand in the corner and take pictures of them sleeping because they’re my
kids so it’s not creepy at all. But all in all, even though I’m convinced they
hate each other, I know that deep deep deep deep down they do love each other
and hopefully one day, sooner than later, they’ll realize just how much. There
is still hope!
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of my daily struggles, from me to you.
dailystruggles101.blogspot.com
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